It's frustrating to...

...have the same conversations about the same issues sometimes with the same people over and over.

...feel like I can't put my finger on it.

...be talked down to.

...see people focused on the symptoms rather than the disease.

...feel like you just aren't getting through.

...be stuck in a rut.

...be ready for a change with no possibility of one for a good long while.

...wonder if you're getting older, but not necessarily wiser.

Peace. Out.

TV Time...

So far, here's what I think of what's on tv this season. Yes, I know it's a lot of TV, but that's the joy of the dual-tuner DVR! :)

New shows I love...
* Studio 60 (NBC, Mondays, 10 pm) - I love everything about this one! The writing is great, the acting and chemistry is superb, and even the direction is interesting (watch for those long steadi-cam shots...they're awesome!). I was most concerned about Matthew Perry looking and acting like Chandler Bing, but he's actually doing a great job creating a completely different character. If you can only check out one new show this year, make it this one!

* Shark (CBS, Thursdays, 10 pm) - I like the main character and the premise of the show (a burnt out defense attorney teaching district-attorneys-in-training how to win). The writing and acting is a little obvious, but I think it will get better.

New shows I'm unsure about...
* Justice (FOX, Wednesdays, 9 pm) - I'm sticking by this one for a few more episodes because I heart Victor Garber, but other than him, I'm not really sold on the show. It may be one that eventually falls by the wayside.

* Six Degrees (ABC, Thursdays, 10 pm) - The show with the sweetest time slot this year (right after Grey's Anatomy) is slow, but okay so far. JJ Abrams is the executive producer, and I'll always love him for Alias, so we'll see.

New shows I hate...
* Smith - (CBS, Tuesdays, 10 pm) - Couldn't even get past the second commercial break. Just completely uninteresting and non-compelling acting and writing.

New shows I plan to check out, but haven't yet...
* Brothers & Sisters, Heroes, Jericho, Supernatural

Returning shows I love...
* Prison Break (FOX, Mondays, 9 pm) - totally drew me back in!

* The Ellen DeGeneres Show (M-F, check your local listings) - I had deserted Ellen last year and forgot how funny she is! She's added lots of new hilarious segments, so if you have the chance, definitely watch!

* Grey's Anatomy (ABC, Thursdays, 9 pm) - The season premiere was great and it seems like future episodes will be as well. This was the one I was most looking forward to returning!

* The Office (NBC, Thursdays, 8:30 pm) - Wonderful season premiere, but Jim better be back in Scranton soon!

Returning shows I may be getting tired of...
* House, Boston Legal

Returning show that's on notice...
* NCIS (CBS, Tuesdays, 8 pm) - I wasn't crazy about the premiere, but this is usually one of my favorite shows. I want to see less Ziva and more Gibbs, then we'll talk.

Returning shows left to check out...
* My Name is Earl, Numb3rs, The Amazing Race, Veronica Mars

Peace. Out.

Happy Banned Book Week!

This week honors those books who have been challenged or banned. It's such an interesting thing, banning books. Censorship, in general, is something I'm very much against. I love and value freedom of speech and understand that, along with that freedom, there are bound to be opinions I don't agree with. And I'm okay with that. So, celebrate this week by reading something someone thinks you shouldn't!

A few related sites...

Google's Banned Books
Most challenged books of the 21st century...so far!
Most challenged books of 2005

Peace. Out.

College students...

I've either been a college student or working with them for the past nine years. But when my pastor asked me last night what I thought our church should be providing for that very group, I went blank. The question is particularly hard since we're not just talking about any college students. We're talking about students who are required to go to two church services a week, to take five Biblical Studies classes as part of their core curriculum, and who are challenged on a near-daily basis by peers and faculty alike to grow in their faith. What do these students need from a church on Sunday morning?

I don't know that we came to a solid conclusion last night, even after several hours of discussion. I know these students want real-ness, they want honesty (and not the syrupy sugar-coated kind), they want "relevance" (but I doubt even a few could define what exactly they mean by that). And they don't just want all of that from their church, they want it in every relationship in which they participate.

When people ask me what the point of church is, I usually have a stock answer - it's for regular fellowship with a body of believers, for accountability, for support, for teaching from a person or persons to whom you've submitted yourself, for community. But the college students around here already get all of that on an almost daily basis. So, we're back to the question...what do these students need from a church on Sunday morning? I honestly don't know the answer.

Any suggestions?

Peace. Out.

Searching...

It's kind of funny that I'm reading the book, Searching for God Knows What, by Donald Miller, at this particular moment in my life. As previously stated on the blog, I went through quite an ordeal this summer, really struggling to maintain a stable, functional relationship with God. And while I feel like it's much better and on track, there's still a long way to go. I read a passage in Searching just yesterday, however, that really struck me.

Miller recounted the story of the time he denounced God's existence. What Miller later realized was that he didn't actually believe God did not exist. It was simply his way of letting go of the god of his youth. That god, the one who had simple answers for simple questions, and didn't like to be challenged, and had no room for mistakes...that god, indeed, no longer existed. With that god out of the way, Miller was able to seek and find the real God, who provided deep answers for difficult questions, who had a purpose for him.

I feel (hope?) like maybe that's what I've been experiencing. Perhaps this is a growing time for me to let go of my simple, small god, and honestly find the one true huge God of the universe. I hope so.

Not only am I still searching for some big answers (and, really...aren't we all?), I'm searching for some small ones too. Paul and I believe we will be moving next summer after I graduate, and it is a little scary to not have a definite plan in place. Since I'm the one who is not currently pursuing the dream, it's up to me to find a place for us where I can do that. Paul is being extremely gracious and supportive, but it's a lot of pressure! One of the places we're considering is Nashville, and we got to spend some time there earlier this week. I absolutely love that town and the whole vibe they've got there. It seems like a place we really would enjoy. But then I came home this weekend and spent time with my family and I have to wonder...how will I handle not seeing them so often? Will I be okay with missing cute things Gabe does? What will it be like when Paul and I have kids of our own? I know people move away from their family all the time, but is it the right decision for us?

So, I'm searching. Searching for answers. Searching for direction. In a way, it's frustrating and scary, this not knowing. But I'm trying to stay focused on the anticipation and excitement part of it. And I'm definitely trying to enjoy the things in the here and now, because time, my friends, is flying, and things will soon be very different.

Peace. Out.

Suri revealed...

So, apparently no one is interested in a theological discussion this week! Maybe this will garner some interest. Yes, that is little Suri Cruise below. Whether she's actually Tom Cruise's biological child...well, we'll probably never know for sure. But either way, she sure is gorgeous!


Peace. Out.